dressed appropriately

Good morning mom, my daughter says before she runs of to her college class, would you listen to my speech please, I wrote about the Hot Chocolate event, just listen don't talk --OK?

That's funny, I like that, don' t talk. Well OK child! I say-
She begins to read her tale of chocolate destruction, and I notice vast differences from reality and fiction, starting with, excluding me completely from the whole event, changing the place and the ages of the children, and elaborating on the order....Is this really what she wants to say, wow, she can really turn on the tears, when she wants to. Effective and yet, disturbing. I believe that this calls for a bit of writers war, I will submit the real story, and allow her to comment.

Place: Sacramento California
Time: Spring,1998

My Mother and I had this great idea, let's take my kids on a train ride- wont that be fun!
We can drive to her house, and the get up early and then take a short train ride to Sacramento, stay in a Hotel overnight, and enjoy day of shopping and walking in the downtown area. We knew how to travel with little kids, we had done it before, but this time, the question was, can they walk? Have you ever seen the kids in strollers that look like they should be pushing around their parents, I can't be too critical for I know not the situation, but for us, we were perfectly able to walk and carry our own backpacks, so that is what we did! Because we'd walk from the trainstation to the Hotel everyone would carry their own things, my Mom loves to walk. Me too

My oldest son at that age loved trains, he is like millions of other kids who were exposed to Thomas the Tank Engine on PBS, with Ringo Star as the original conductor and then the (late)great comedian George Carlin. Thomas the Tank Engine was a happy train, a blue train, with the number 1 on the side, and very prevalent Toy in all good toy stores, and Sacramento had a wonderful train museum, with beautifully restored train cars available to anyone who wants to board them, and see what travel used to be like for many Americans, in the not so far away past. Giant metal Dinosaurs, still and quiet, nothing the like muscle that once was way the west was transeformed. That little TV show, inspired families to love trains again, to play with them and best of all to learn about the heritage they have with the American dream. We fell for it, and I still have those trains.

We boarded our AMTRAK TRAIN at the new station in Emmeryville California, it is just across the bay from San Francisco, and a mere three hours from Sacramento by train. It was an uneventful morning, all went smoothly, and after the sun came up we had lovely sunshine! We sat in a dining car, and looked at the world go by, as we talked, played cards, ate snacks and agreed that this was the way to travel. We were very happy for most of the trip, and between my Mom , my Stepfather, and my three children, we managed to take up enough room that no one bothered us or even sat near us, the wonder of children. Boredom does set in, and none of the Harry Potter charmschool was there in those days, nor was there any talking trains. Kids make it fun for us, but they dont like to sit still for many hours, they like to wiggle.
What is it about kids, that makes grown people squirm? Well on this trip we were about to learn exactly what it is we are most afraid of when it comes to traveling -with kids. This is not to say that there aren't real fears, but this is the kind that is irrational, the kind that needs to be conjured up in the imagination to be likely. Not the fear of being stolen, or injured or lost, not real life fears. This is the kind of fear, that sounds like, " Eew, they have kids let's not go over there.." Seen and not heard, or PigPEN, or Rugrats...yea there are plenty of names for children, but I like the quote from My Fair Lady," why are children so childish..." that explains it!

My Mother is no cheapskate, shes a deep pocket spender, to her credit she always treated us, whether we deserved it or not, like royalty. We ate a the finest restaurants, wore- the best clothes, and yes stayed in the best Hotels, and this time was no exception, we stayed the Hilton across from the State Capitol, with a view of the dome like no other. It was a beautiful room, probably nicer than my house. The kind of room you could think about living in, so clean and large we could all enjoy our own space and not bother each other. I am always grateful for her kind generosity, I know my kids remember it too. (I was most sad Ashley did not refer to this part at all in her story, but she did keep the whole story at my Mothers house)

We all had the time to clean and dress and pop out into the world all bright and shiny, and I remember that it was a Sunday, and I was so used to going to Church, that I said to my mom, why don't we look at the Cathedral over there and see if we can sit in Church today. My mom does like the Lord, but shes like my Husband has a love for him outside the Church, and does not desire to try to fit into a worship service. When we peeked into the Catholic Sanctuary, it was right out of any one room Catholic Church. People are lighting candles, and kneeling, while others are sitting contently to have silent prayer, and here we are,three adults- with three little kids who want breakfast more than redemption. No service for an hour, it was best we leave and think maybe later, but we don't return. We go just across the street, to wait of course for the service to start, to a nice cafe bright and cheerful with an outside sitting area, it offered sunshine and fresh air, in this beautiful city landscape. My mother is determined now to eat something and in Ashley's version of this story, she orders Oatmeal and Corn Pops for all the kids, well, there was none of that, it was just -Hot Chocolate for the first order of the day.

Yes, she wanted Three HOT Chocolates for the kids, and I am thinking -really?
Now don't get me wrong, I mean, I am the doting mother, but my Mom, she's the over zealous Grandmother, and it's like, I am going to give them - what they want. But I kinda knew what was going to happen. First she wanted them to order, and I said, mom-let them sit here and we order, no she insisted -each child speak for himself. Well that is great when it comes to ordering, and I all for free speech, but she forgot the biggest problem, now that they have spoken it will come.

Just picture, three small children, no taller than your waist, in a room that is about the size and configuration of a Sees Candy shop, basically everyone has to stand next to each other to order, and we call see and hear each other. Now, imagine three kids ages, 8, 6 and 3 holding large cups of steamed hot chocolate with a mountain of whipping cream glopped on top. Got the visual, now what did I not detail, what is missing? I did not say, cups with lids...yep, and kids that see whipping cream, think yum. Now if this was a black and white film, and you saw what was about to transpire you'd laugh like it was a three stooge flick, but as a mother watching three kids, at exactly the same time, take three cups of cocoa, and try to lick the cream off the top, and realize its too HOT! and then proceed to pour the entire cup onto their clothes and then onto the floor, you are not laughing! - at least on the outside, you have to put on a grave front, and look as if this has never happened before, and surprise is the best character face to put on, oh dear how could this happen? While inside I am thinking that was hilarious! OMG!

At this point, my mom is not happy for real, shes like I just spent like 15$ on those, we will have to ask for more. I am thinking --seriously, your going back, and she proceeds to take the children by the hand to the counter! its like two feet away, we literally did not even take a step with the first cups and shes asking for more before they are even finished cleaning up?

Of course the Cafe wants to look good, poor kids....here you go, have some more, MORE?
Wait, can we get a lid this time, ah wait, can I hold that-- wait!! Well, there goes another one..
yes folks, we are idiots we don't know how to drink, and we go to public places to just simply horrify you. People in the cafe, are running out, grown men with newspapers are frowning and taking their things outside, people are actually covering their clothes....
Stepfather to the rescue! He opens the side door, if we can just get outside, my mom grabs Nolan's cup before its a total loss, and we think for sure this time Ash can walk slowly outside, if we can just get outside....
and to this day its a pretty sad story, Ash could really do well for herself, to drag this out of the closet her whole life, and say what idiots her parents were, maybe I am glad I was not in her story!

well, I cant say , but maybe we should have gone to Church, maybe, but my little girl, with soft blond hair and fair skin, tall and thin, she took one step outside, missed the ground it looked like and tripped, on air and proceeded to hold onto her cup of cocoa while her knees and elbows protected her cup from the ground, and yes back onto her, she baithed in it this time I can still muster up tears... she was needless to say, very sad and people around us, stared at us with faces out of sheer shock of ridiculousness. I wanted to sit for a moment and just realize, that none of us, had any will to order another thing, and still not a single thing to eat for the adults or the children. This day had just turned into a hot Chocolate nightmare. Never again would I look at hot Chocolate the same, and I would say its called HOT for a reason! The sw et story of the Polar Express and the Hot Chocolate is a humorous moment for us, if only it was that good.

It did not occur to me at the this juncture that we would look like street urchins trying to return to our Hotel room, but my parents did their best to cover up the damage done by wicked hot chocolate, and we slid ourselves back into our room.
You know that Hot Chocolate stains, something fierce! it does not wipe off with water, and its terrible if it just sits on clothes. The kids had to take showers to get clean, and we had to use our last day clothes a day early, to get back to normal. Nothing like shower to put things right...wait how did that cup get in here, wait is that a child still drinking the cocoa, NO WAY!

Forever we will fear Hot Chocolate! Its humorously scary!

This is what childhood looks like for us. We can have all the fancy trimmings and foods, we cannot stop the spots the make us human. We should laugh a lot- and then clean it all up. It was James Barrie that wrote a good mother will clean out the child brain each night with good thoughts, like clean clothes for the next day, to make our thoughts good and pure each day.
I am happy Ash looks back on this with laughter and humility I look back and remember too , thanks Ash.



Love You Always

MOM